This Is How I Feel

This feeling won't go away, This feeling of not being strong enough, This pain, it hurts, Will it ever go away? I don’t know anymore, I feel lifeless, Unworthy, Trash, Destroyed, Broken, Life less, Dead, Empty inside and out, Will I ever get past this feeling of numbness of pain? He won't remember me, will he? I don't know. I hurt him, didn't I? No, I had no choice, I told him that, I told him I didn't want to break the best thing that's happened to me in a very long time, He won't forgive me, will he? He was hurt, He fell in love, I broke him, Even after I promised I would never, This Horrible pain inside me, It's so powerful, I can’t push it away, It won't go away, Will I ever heal the same, Will I ever be the same, Will I ever be happy again? I feel like I deserve to feel like this, I don't know anymore Every time I try to move passed it, “It always comes back as if it’s attached to my soul” Am I not worth the fight? Maybe, Maybe not, It’s as if i'm in a prison full of all my demons and mistakes I made in the past I feel trapped like a zoo animal inside a stainless steel cage, I feel hopeless, I feel like i'm stuck, I try to get better, Be more happier, But then my demons give me a reason not to be happy anymore, I become this empty, Numb, Lifeless, Fake, Dead person inside and out, “I feel like I will never escape this hideous painful world we call life” I hide things from people, Important people who mean everything to me, Certain things that I'm scared to tell ppl about, I'm scared to tell them how I feel inside, How I feel, I feel scared, I’m afraid that I will never be happy again, Never be careless again, Never escape this pain we call The depression cycle of life, That’s how I truly think 24/7!

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